| Learn to Roll with Life's Punches and Bounce | | | | Alzheimer's caregiver knows that mistakes, |
| BackWhat can the martial arts teach Alzheimer's | | | | challenges, and frustrations are inevitable.And you |
| family caregivers? Plenty. One powerful lesson | | | | know what makes that simple setback worse? |
| comes from Aikido, a powerful, ethical,dynamic | | | | It's that good old human tendency to get upset |
| and beautiful martial art. Aikido means: "The Way | | | | because you made a mistake. We are expert at |
| of Harmonizing Energy." Aikido practitioners learn | | | | tormenting ourselves by getting distressed, angry |
| to blend and steer an opponent's force to safely | | | | anxious, nervous, worried, or whatever- just |
| control a situation. In the process of training we | | | | because we ran into a frustration. That's the way |
| learn a lot about ourselves as well.One thing that | | | | in which we tighten up emotionally as we fall. And |
| we learn in Aikido is ukemi (pronounced | | | | we know what pain that can lead to. Sound |
| ooh-keh-mee) training. Ukemi is the art of falling | | | | familiar?So, how can we roll with caregiving's |
| down safely. It is important to learn how to fall in | | | | punches?1. Expect to fall, to be frustrated at |
| this martial art, so that you don't get hurt when | | | | times. It is inevitable in life, and even more |
| you are thrown. Basically, injury to yourself is not | | | | unavoidable for a caregiver.2. Perfect your own |
| the result of being thrown hard, it's the effect of | | | | personal emotional ukemi training. Stubbornly |
| falling poorly. Knowing how to fall well is essential | | | | refuse to torture yourself about your mistake. |
| for those times when you are thrown. You can | | | | Learn to relax when you are frustrated.3. Find |
| spend a lifetime perfecting this skill. And you might | | | | ways to remind yourself that it's OK to make |
| as well. Take it from me: Gravity Always Wins.In | | | | mistakes, and that the important thing is to relax, |
| everyday life, when we fall down, we | | | | get your balance, and get back up. You could |
| automatically tighten up our bodies, and increase | | | | make a sign that says something like "Relax," or |
| the risk of injury. In ukemi trraining, we learn to | | | | "Balance," and hang it where you can see it. make |
| gradually relax and let go of tension, even as we | | | | more than one.4. Don't ignore your signs once |
| fall. This training leads to much softer impact, and | | | | they are up. When you pass your sign, stop a |
| a much happier Aikido-ist. Falling begins to feel | | | | minute, and rehearse its message. That's the way |
| more like floating, and less like crashing.Now, am I | | | | advertising works.5. Get in the habit of rewarding |
| sugesting that you drop everything and go enroll | | | | yourself not for being perfect, and not just when |
| in Aikido classes? Of course not! But you can | | | | things are going along smoothly. Instead, celebrate |
| adopt the philosophy of falling well. What is the | | | | that you got back up to try again.6. If you are |
| lesson of ukemi training for life? Putting aside the | | | | comfortable, try sharing this radical philosophy |
| martial arts reasons for training, IN LIFE WE | | | | with others.7. Remember: it's not the mistake that |
| CONSTANTLY FALL DOWN! And caregiving is a | | | | stops you. It's your decision to stop that stops |
| continual challenge filled with even more sudden | | | | you.8. Finally, keep in mind a wise old Buddhist |
| throws, and many expected and unexpected | | | | saying:"if you fall down seven times, get up eight |
| falls.So we need to learn to fall with grace.Think | | | | times."I trained for years with a very remarkable |
| about it. If a person is bound and determined to | | | | person who was also a caregiver. When I would |
| never ever waver, to never try a different | | | | see him and ask how he was doing, he'd smile |
| approach, what will happen when she hits an | | | | and say, "I'm still taking ukemi." And then we'd |
| obstacle? What will happen when her usual | | | | train. I wish you good ukemi! |
| approach to caregiving isn't working right? Any | | | | |